My story started out when I was 16 years old. I was having intense menstrual cycles and missing school all the time because of the pain and it was taking a toll. My mom took me to her Gynecologist, and he wanted to do a surgery to see if I had Endometriosis since I had all the symptoms. A few weeks later, I had my first Laparoscopy and he found a ton of endo. The only problem was that it was too close to a major artery, and he didn’t feel comfortable excising it, so he closed me up and referred me to an Oncologist who had more experience in that area. Three months later, I was back under to have it removed. The recovery was mild and I was back to being a normal senior in high school, but this time with no pain.
Fast forward 4 years – Kasey and I got married in April of 2015. The year leading up to us getting married I had experienced a few stints in the ER and they couldn’t ever tell me what was wrong, but we figured it had to do with my Endometriosis. After about 9 months of being married, we decided to start trying, since we didn’t know how long it would take with my history. After negative tests for a year straight, we ended up going to a fertility specialist.
The specialist ordered all the normal tests and came to the conclusion that I wasn’t ovulating due to PolyCystic Ovarian Syndrome, or PCOS. They suggested doing a trigger shot to make me ovulate and to do timed intercourse, where you give yourself a shot and have sex every 12 hours over a 36 hour period of time. Needless to say, it didn’t work. After that we went on to IUI. We were so positive it was going to work, so when I got the call I wasn’t pregnant, it was devastating. After the second IUI, I started bleeding on day 5, so I didn’t even bother going to my blood test. Why pay for it if I knew I wasn’t pregnant? The clinic called me several times to get me to come in to take my blood and after a few weeks I decided to go in. They called me within 2 hours and told me I was pregnant! I couldn’t believe it. I was at the grocery store and just left my cart full of groceries in the aisle and walked out. We were so ecstatic and excited. Our family had been on this journey with us, so we told everyone that day. Unfortunately, 3 days later, I started bleeding a lot and lost the baby.
It was a hard time, but also we were so hopeful because it had worked! If it worked once, it could work again. We ended up doing 4 more IUI’s, and none of them worked. I was devastated. We were out of money, and decided to save for IVF. After talking to my sister-in-law one day on the phone, I was crying saying that I was defeated because saving up for IVF would take a long time. A few hours later, my brother called me and said he talked to his wife and he wanted to offer us an interest free loan to pay for IVF so we could get started right away. It was 3 days before Christmas and the best gift ever. I talked to my husband and we decided to start treatment.
After two and a half years of trying, we started IVF and everything went smoothly from there on out. Sure, it was emotionally draining and hard on my body, but it was easier than I had anticipated. They were able to retrieve 28 eggs and out of those, 10 of them became viable embryos. We decided to wait and do a frozen embryo transfer or FET. On March 28, 2018 we transferred one embryo, and on April 4 we got the call. I was pregnant! I was a nervous wreck everyday until about 12 weeks, and even then, nervous every time I felt a cramp or weird twinge until the end. On December 11, 2018, our perfect baby boy was born weighing a whopping 9 pounds 6 ounces. Everything about him was perfect, and we were elated to finally have our baby. He has been the happiest little guy since day one and we are so grateful.
Looking back, I wish I wouldn’t have wished away the time. We were able to travel and have a lot of good times just the 2 of us, and I wouldn’t trade that for anything. It made our relationship stronger when it was time to fight for our family. When I was down and feeling defeated, Kasey would come in and lift me up and tell me it was going to be okay. Now that translates into parenthood when I am stressed about Mason when he is sick, or when I am frustrated after a long day at home with a teething baby. Kasey is strong and happy and playful.
Our story doesn’t end there. When Mason was 6 months old I realized I was late on my cycle. I never thought it would be possible, so I took a pregnancy test. Anyone who has experienced infertility knows that the day you take a test is the day you start your period. Well, I was wrong. Staring back at me in big capital letters, the test said PREGNANT. I couldn’t believe it. I actually cried for a few days every time I looked at my tiny 6 month old and realized our time with just him was short lived. That quickly went away however, when we found out we would be giving him a brother to love, just 15 months younger than he.
During this trial, I had a lot of tender mercies of people bringing us dinner, dropping off treats or just sending a text to see how we were. We were extremely blessed by the generosity of others and the love we felt during that time. Infertility taught me to be more mindful of others and to reach out more often, because we don’t always know what is going on in other people’s lives. There were times I felt like I couldn’t keep going or couldn’t be strong anymore, but when you’re in the thick of it, what other option do you have? Stay strong, keep fighting, and don’t go through this alone! Find your people and let them lift you through this. It is so hard, but oh so worth it.
Instagram: @allidupre
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